UFOs Over Texas

No doubt many of you have heard about the reported UFO sightings that took place near Stephenville, Texas last week. Some people reported seeing a bright cylindrical object hovering near the town, while others described a similar object flying at incredible speeds just overhead.

What could all of this mean? Well, maybe the UFOs could be aliens like the kind we saw in the movie "Close Encounters of the Third Kind." The aliens in that show were really alien looking- bulbous heads, huge eyes, and long ganglia-type appendages- kinda like pro basketball player Sam Cassell. Who knows, maybe it was Sam Cassell? We all know how much money pro ball players make. Maybe instead of buying a Bentley, he bought a custom-made spacecraft from Europe.

But, while I'm speculating on whether these UFOs are really aliens and what they might look like, then I prefer my aliens to look like the hot female aliens you see on shows like Star Trek and all of its various iterations. After all, if the planet is going to be taken over by another race, wouldn't it be nice if they were attractive? Especially if their intention is to, um...er, propagate with the local inhabitants.

Oh sure, some of the female aliens might have faces that look like a lizard or a wildebeest or something of that nature, but if they have the body of Pamela Anderson who cares? At that point, I think a guy just has to don his beer goggles and go in for the kill!

Oops! My wife is standing over me with a club! What I meant to say was a "single" guy could swoop in for the kill! I guess us married guys will just hear about it in the locker room at the YMCA. To wit:

"Greg, who was that woman you were with last night? I couldn't quite see her from across the bar but she looked smokin'!"

"Yeah, she's got a hot body, but she has a face like a Tyrannosaurus!"

"So, what happened?"

"You wouldn't believe it. She has this really cool sled and she took me for a test drive. The next thing you know, I'm on this operating table with a bunch of lizard people standing over me!"

"Dude, I told you to stop doing those shots of Jager...!"