If it's January, it must be time to lose weight!

Here we are, the last day of the year, and I find myself in a predictable pattern of behavior. After wading through countless trays of Christmas goodies, consuming vast quantities of adult beverages, not exercising, and doing my best impersonation of Homer Simpson, I stand on the precipice of 2008 roughly 20 lbs. overweight.

It's not like I haven't been down this road before, but in the past, I've been able to easily lose 10-20 lbs. in a matter of a few weeks. Last year was different. It's like a switch went off inside my body that prevented me from losing the 10 lbs. I gained the year prior. So, I went through all of 2007 ten lbs. overweight until I hit Thanksgiving. From that point to now, I've basically added about a half pound of blubber per day.

My main reason for wanting to get rid of the extra 20 lbs. is not for vanity's sake, but for the sake of my wallet. After looking through my closet, I realized I only have 3 pairs of pants that fit. The other 10 or 12 pairs now belong to a subset of my wardrobe that might be called upon in the future to serve again. It's kind of like the Army reserves, but with no pay. Women generally refer to this subset of the wardrobe as their "skinny" wardrobe. Interestingly, the other subset is not referred to as "fat" or "overweight" rather it's given the inocuous title of "regular."

Now that my "skinny" wardrobe represents about 80% of my total wardrobe, it's time for action. I'm determined to lose the 20 lbs. and win back the rest of my clothes. It's either that, or spend hundreds of dollars adding to my "regular" wardrobe which I'm loathe to do.

I wonder if I can lose 20 lbs. by switching from "regular" beer to Lite?

OK all of you hard-bitten Republicans out there, it's time for you to give it up for (drumroll, please) Democratic Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts! Why would you applaud Lurch, er, I mean, Sen. Kerry? Well, it seems the esteemed Sen. Kerry recently penned a letter to NFL commissioner Roger Goodell petitioning him to have the upcoming New England Patriots game broadcast on regular TV. For those of you who don't follow sports closely, New England is one victory away from the first undefeated pro football season in over 30 years. Millions of people will be glued to their set to watch the outcome. If you still don't understand why this matters, read no further, this Bud's definitely not for you!

Apparently Mr. Kerry's missive must've had some impact since Mr. Commissioner has acquiesced and agreed to put Saturday's game between the Patriots and the NY Giants on both NBC and CBS. Now, that's a politician with clout!

Now, let's see if Mr. Kerry can take it one step further and propose an amendment to The Constitution that requires all NFL games to be broadcast on free TV. The NFL network is an abomination to our liberty and an affront to all freedom-loving Americans.

If Mr. Kerry can accomplish this feat, he'll definitely get my write-in vote for Prez come November!

As if we didn't have enough reminders that we are getting older, here's another one: Led Zeppelin recently reunited for a benefit concert in London. If you haven't seen any of the videos from the concert, you should check them out- just click on the pics to the right.

Although it was a little shocking to see Jimmy Page with shock white hair, he'd probably be equally shocked at my appearance (that is, if he knew what I looked like 30 years ago.) Oh sure, I still have the 6-pack abs, unfortunately they were acquired from consumption of too many 6-packs, and not enough Tai-Bo exercises (my apologies to Billy Blanks.)

With his graying beard and long hair, Robert Plant looks like he just came into town on a boxcar. Come to think of it, he looked that way in '72, so not much has changed other than the fact that he can't hit the high notes anymore. To be fair, I can't hit the high notes either, except when the monthly American Express bill arrives in the mail!

To be brutally honest, I can't hit the middle to low range notes either, however, one time I did manage to sing an amazing rendition of Zep's "Whole Lotta Love" in the shower. By amazing, I don't necessarily mean good, since the end result of my singing was a knock on the door by The Police (local law enforcement, not the band.) Apparently a neighbor heard my cater-walling and thought someone was being bludgeoned to death. Ouch!

The point to all of this is that there is no point. Good music is still good music no matter what your age. Sure, your drug of choice may now be Alleve, but one thing's for sure- The Song Remains the Same!